Monday, 1 September 2014

this things also affect my mood

ACNE,PIMPLES,SCARS. huhhh disgusting things that keep appearing on my face.ok mls nk mbbebel dlm bahase inggeris.. sekarang ni, im using nour ain skincare again . ok please dont complain why im using this one back . im just trying to be loyal and stick to one... and mmg muke skrg ni, lg teruk drp mase form 5 and lagi teruk drp tahun lepas. teruk tu bkn la smpi xnampak muke sebenar, tp teruk tu sbb sbelum ni pernah memliki kulit yg flawless -__- and skrg ni. jrwt batu sukee naik kt area misai tu . hahaha. and me will picit laa sbb lau x, nampak mcm ade taik lalat kt situ. ceh. mcmla lau xpicit, xnampak kan. so mmg nampak n tggl parut kt situ. ya rabbi, berikan aku kesabaran utk tnggu muke ni kembali licin. possible kah ? satu hari ni, aku down giler. ya allah, rase bulan ogos tu byk sgt ke down nan nyerr.. i stalk someone's instagram. i did adore him. did. coz now im not into him anymore. he was flirting with other girl, yet she's kelantanese too. and he addressed the girl 'barbie', while the barbie adressed him prince charming. and my heart was ... okay, tlg fefeeling sendiri my feeling on that time.mmg girl tu mcm barbie pon, and tudung labuh. hahaha nak nangis ase. she is quite perfect from my view. and me? i was not perfect at all.. and that time, my self esteem is zero. and i told my roomate, im ugly, thats why nobody wants me. i will be forever single coz im ugly. mmg mase tu, down tahap ap.ase nk delete sgala benda yg boleh interact ng manusia, ase nk masuk dlm tanah je. teruk kan? astaghfirullah al azim. i was wrong to feel that way. i have Allah, and my life is not to be looked by ppl .its between me and Allah. please take lesson from my story and dont be like me.this is a 'sometime feelin' that i actually can control. its just , sometimes .. i cant .. sorry Allah for dustakan nikmatMu.. okay sambung balik. lepas tu, my roomate pon ckp.. <<ni ckp dlm wasap ni>> "awk nak ke kawen ng org yg suke sbb rupe?awk nk ke rse syg die tu sbb rupe je?rupe xkekal pon,nnt lmbt laun pudar jgk. ikut awkla if awk nk gitu.. ikut awkla.. .....". lameeeeeee fikir, ya Allah btul jgk rumet ak ckp. tp ade ke org xpndang rupe lgsung? ye lettuw. and i think that im gelojoh. yela, kite nmpk sume org dh jmp kekasih ati msing2, dh jumpe parents segala. yg ak ni plak calon pon xde, bapak mertua lg laa xde.. pdhl ak xperlu gelojoh.umur bru 19 thun. asasi pon xlepas lg.ingt ade nak ko? bljr dlu,kumpul kelebihan diri. nnt mak mertua tny, ap ko ade, nk jwb ap? huhuhu.. ye, aku ni gelojoh. pdhl ad bnda lain lg yg ak perlu utamakan. yes, my studies, my families. yes, all this things will wash away that feeling to love someone. ye, mmg ak dah tak suke sape2 pon skrg ni sbb ak bukannye bersedia utk sume tu. now, ak hny mmpu mndgr cerita org. ad cite hepy, n ad jgk kisah sedihnye. yg bepisah pon ade. lame dh xade prasaan cmtu.Alhamdulillah,xlarat den nk tanggung sume tu balik. terkongkong. and im happy with my life, dikelilingi kawan yg annoying n yg xannoying.they all colour my, lantak kaula jerawat nak naik nyer, i just hope that my jodoh xnampak jrwt tu, or accept my flaws coz i really got plenty flaws. :'( dh brusaha, n hny berserah pdMu Allah .

Sabarlah wahai hati . yes, ain sabar orangnye and thats why Allah puts me into this tests. In shaa allah :')
sincerely Miss LOL

Aku memang confirm xamik engineering .

Biasenye lau nak cakap pasal pelajaran,pointer,masalah belajar and all those things that related myself as a student,i would share it with my Papa and he will always be the one who listenED to my sadness and my stupidity .and aftr that, he would try to help me by giving spirits and a lot of ideas either to pursue study at somewhere else or etc. but now, seriously im blanked. coz i rarely tell my mum about my study's problems coz i am more to my dad if about study matter coz i guess my dad could help me solving it. hehehe. so, now there is new problem that i got when studying in this UIA. yes, i will never ask Mia to study here. let me be the only one who suffer here. seriously, im suffering here. i know.. Allah puts me here for some reasons. yes, somehow there are pros and cons . and the con here is, the foundation here is so long long long and yes its getting longer. -_____- today, me and my buddy, Hanis met academic advisor to get some advices regarding our physics marks that didnt fulfil the requirement for engineering's degree. and you know what, to repeat that subject, i have to extend this foundation till the end of next year.this means , my foundation is not 2 years. but 2 years and a half. dont ask why and how if youre not UIAN's coz you will be bored and never understand their system . well said, im not going to have engineering as my degree coz i wont extend my foundation which everyone who are in same age with me, already pursue their degree.. i feel so ashamed with myself. Hanis coaxed my very hard. she asks me to perform Istikarah if im really confused. yes, may Allah gives me hint coz i really need that right now. I dont know what to choose for my degree. plus, im not that intelligent to try and error other courses. i have to choose correctly coz degree is a big matter .hmmmmmmmm, sad isnt? Kubih and Ss are officialy degreeans. while me?still foundationian. ya Allah, if only they know how i feel right now. seriously upset and im more to just keep silent coz i dont want this problem to drag all my happy mood. guys, please pray for me. and accept me the way i am though im not as clever as you guys. from sad girl with a sad life XD
sincerely Miss LOL