Saturday, 2 September 2017

Insecurities

I bet that everyone has been dealing with this matter especially those who are around my age. Insecurities? What are those? We have heard this quite a lot and the girls face these the most rather than boys because they think too much and often worry about unnecessary stuffs.

Lets get this straight to the topic.

Me myself have a lot of insecurities and my friends too have fear of not getting what they want and what women should possess.

Beauty, wealth, intelligence, good in baking, good in cooking, nice clothes, good taste, flawless skin,ideal weight and height and countless stuffs to be mentioned within an entry. We can make our own list. We tend to feel this whenever we compare ourselves with others who got more than us in any categories. The 'others' most probably who appear in social medias, the instafamous clans and among their friends too. I notice that social medias or particularly instagram has become a media where people display their passion and joy. It is fine depending on their intention but sadly some of the viewers mistakenly reckon the posts as something that bother their self esteem.

Why do we afraid to be less than others? Why being ordinary or normal becomes exclusive? Why do we always want to be more or become the one who they look up to? Why? What is going on with today's generation? Let us not point to others because I myself have to admit that I am also the victim of this situation. I feel insecure and start comparing my so-ordinary-look-and-life with the other lucky girls. I ask myself why am I not flawless? Why am I not that intelligent? Why cant I have a vacation overseas? Why do they have a perfect pose in every post? Why they got so pretty outfit? Where do they get so much money to purchase this and that? The why and how would never come to the end until I begin to feel enough @ contented with myself and count the blessings that I always mislook :') We always forget to list down our unseen fortunes that others might not have them. We tend to appreciate physical things and the tangible one. We barely appreciate of having a long term memory, a good eye sight, loyalty, being a good listener, have good common sense and other stuffs that are not physically seen. Walla ! Have you ever thank to Him for the things that I mention or you might cross in your mind? Theres a lot to be grateful actually rather than screwing up your mind thinking of things that you cannot change or create or you even dont put effort to build them. And yes, you forget that some things cannot be forced. You cant force yourself to do things that you dislike. People might be good in things as they have passion in them, and you dont have that talent because you dont like them and effortlessly step into the phase. For instance, how can you dream to put on nice and smooth make up if you dont like to put the makeups? Why should you be jealous in negative way towards people who are good in musics or any other talents that you dont even dare or interested in the field? Forget about being too negative in yourself and start sowing the talents in you. Figure out your passion and sharpen them so that it would not be wasted. Count your blessings. It is not bad to feel insecure but do not exaggarate or it might harm you. Love yourself and then you can be relaxed seeing others in success. Everyone  is born different specialities and ability. We must not be sensitive and down for not having them. Cherish the moments and always remember if you feel unlucky during the moments in world, plan to get the best one in hereafter. Because the real journey is not to achieve everything in this temporary life, Allah is waiting us with tons of rewards soon. So be good :)

Sorry if I have a bad grammar or simple vocabulary though I am pursuing my studies in this field. Im currently in upgrading myself. Dont you worry peeps. Improvement consumes time ☺

Footnote X
whenever you suffer from this pain or sorrow about the worldy matter, put a halt from whatever youre doing and give some spaces for yourself to be with Allah. Tell Him what you feel, tell Him what youre lacking of, tell Him everything. Spend a time to pray at the mosque, perform jammah prayer even only for a one time prayer. Maybe you need a break in giving too much to life and people. Dont you feel fair to dream to many fancy stuffs without being so effortful? Yas, there are some gifted people but can you just not question about them? 😊


sincerely Miss LOL

Wednesday, 16 August 2017

Feelings

I got mixed feelings these days. Why cant I get rid of someone who never ever likes me back and never treats me nicely. Why should I ever worried about him quite a lot. I ve been trying to cut them off but at some time, it keeps coming back and I dont like it. I know it is so wrong for me to wait him any longer. But when I'm in the phase reminiscing him, I miss him a lot. In normal phase, I dont actually miss him and like what he had done to me. It is beyond that one could ever imagine. Leaving me text unresponded is one thing, and when he texted he never picked the nice words for me. There would be lots and lots of sarcasm and hint to stop me from keeping this feeling towards him. I got the hint already but it just at one time, I miss the memories that we had. It was like we were meant for each other. Everything was real. My love towards him was pure and sincere. I never had a thought to leave or treat him bad like how it turned out today. I wish he knows how bad I hurt when he comes and leaves me like it doesnt give impacts to me.
sincerely Miss LOL

Friday, 3 March 2017

So what have I spent for this semester? part 1

Now that we have entered March and it means that I have been in UIA for more than a month.  I did drafted my goals for this semester  and one of them that I really put efforts/steps on it (less shopping, less outing, more spending just in UIA and doing something that don’t need money) is menabung?????? Cut off all the budgets (unnecessary stuffs to buy, UNNEEDED stuffs or UNWANTED or just to fulfil your lust) USE YOUR BRAIN WISELY TO FILTER YOUR WISHLIST. Hoho emo jap.

My previous goals were ;

  • New phone with upgraded features (I phone, vivo siti :P)
  • Travel to overseas (once in a blue moon pon okay what?)
  •  Wear braces
  • Do Lasik treatment
But my latest (really2 latest one) I want to save money so that I can shop quite a lot and without limit during RAYA SALE, YEAR END SALE or maybe PRELOVED SALE. Yeah. Not to forget, saving so that I can have “best friends” trip again and shop at that place lol. Hahaha I really can’t resist sale but for now, I still can prevent myself from shopping as long as my goals hover in my mind. Please stay in there so that I can save a lot.
Congratulations to me because I have succeeded in managing my lust from shopping unwanted and unneeded things though they were cute, cheap and irresistible. But, I comfort myself and yeah good things worth waiting.

What I have spent for February was;

  • White palazzo from Bella Ammara which only costs rm45
  • 3 pieces of plain shawls for rm23 only
  • Candy bawal for rm24 only
  • Watching movies twice for rm23.50 only
  • Silky girl compact powder for rm20.00 lol
And I didn’t spend so much since yeah maybe due to the “still hot” spirit but I really hope that I it will last till the end of semester.

Recently, I have received several stuffs as my birthday presents like blouse from Bella Ammara, baju kurung wadiadra, candy bawal  and piggy bank and random things (fancy needles and hello kitty bracelets) I love all the gifts and the thought for me. I am so delighted because no need to buy lah, dah ada orang kasi kann.

Hurm what I crave now are

  • ·         Black palazzo
  • ·         Scarlet blouse from nenggeulis.co
  • ·         Rosey Kurung from wadi adra
  • ·         Pinafore top (yang trending sekarang)
  • ·         Cloverush Lily colour pink !

And this list will grow soon since the fashion is developing so fast and I can’t even chase them. Tak nak kejar pun huhu..

sincerely Miss LOL

Wednesday, 21 December 2016

SHOPPING is a satisfaction XD

Well I love december. Acewah bukan december je. I love all days where I can go shopping. tapi december ialah bulan yg ditunggu2 oleh para wanita khususnya insan yg bernama Ain Irdinaaa ni kots sebab Ain ni suka beli benda yang within her budget and I can afford to purchase it using my own pocket money. senang cite December ni byk YEAR END SALE, CLEARANCE SALE and macam2 ah. waduhhhh ! okay anyway sebenarnye semalam rase puas sebab dapat shopping even online. jarang sgt shopping online or maybe ni first time kot beli online from IG sebab biase mahal kan sebab postage and so on. mostly suke beli barang yg dah display kat kedai macam tu sebab senang nak pilih colour and jenis material and jugak saiz, muat tak muat longgar tak longgar. Tapi semalam shopping shawl. mengidam shawlll sangat22222222.. nak beli shawl maroon, skin colour, soft pink, light green, and many more. tapi tu je yg ade dlm kepala skrg ni. Lau xbeli mesti terbayang2.. tapi nak yg murah . hahaha. biasela. I'm very picky when it comes to shopping. so semalam, i bought from an IG shop that Ive been following all this while. selama ni mampu tgk je sebab harge die mahal ya ampun !!!!! memang tgk jela kerja. tgk and like. tp smlm dia announce SALE. ape lgi, ptg tu dh siap2 save number. bile die dh letak kt catalogue, terus I pm. kihkih. So, basically just nk menceritakan kelegaan bile dpt shopping. setelah menahan diri dr shopping due to exam week and study week and also last week of class ! memang hectic sangat222 sampai nak pecah kepala den. okayy, doakan Ain dpt jawab 6 papers sem ni. first paper on 24/12/2016 and today is 22/12. lets get started ! Bismillah ~
sincerely Miss LOL

Friday, 2 December 2016

Adab Meminta Tolong XD

This post is not dedicated to anyone, but I guess I really need to write a bit about the 'adab' since I feel like most of the people who are seeking for help mostly not seeking the real 'help' ( I mean they DONT really need the help, they are just too lazy to do it and not asking for help, but rather force ppl to help )

Okay, mcm ni. nak cerita serba sedikit pasal people who love to ask for my help. tapi don't get me wrong. seriously, I love to help people and I realise yg sometimes I really think hard to solve people's difficulties and even sacrifices my time or energy for them. tapi rasenyer org misuse my willingness and often tak consider pon bile mintak tolong. 


cara mintak tolong tu x macam mintak tolong pon.

it sounded like this :

"boleh tak kau tolong fotostat 10000 pages nota ni? aku xde mood lah hari ni nak pegi kedai fotostat"

"boleh tak kau bukak website ni, pastu tolong snap gambar tu pastu antar kat aku. cepat sikit wei. aku nak guna ni. ... .... wei asal xdapat lagi ni??????? aku tunggu ni.. online je kau ni.... "

"weh teman aku pegi tandas. teman aku pegi kedai tu, kedai ni. teman ak balik kampung. teman aku kemanaaa sahajaaaaaaaaaaa. transport kau bayar sendiri muahahahhahahaha "

Okay, maybe my example mcm hyperbola sgt kot. tapi points dia kat sini, the help that people ask mostly macam :

1) memaksa untuk buat

2) tak consider orang tu boleh tolong ke tak, free ke tak

3) tanya banyak kali, bertubi tubi..

4) still tanyaa even orang tu dah buat muka reluctant and dah tolak


okayy, so heres a few list of adab in requesting help from others.

firstly,,,, lau nak mintak tolong orang, tanya duluuu sama ada orang tu available tak free tak pastikan dia free dluuu before u go forward asking help from her. so that, kau pon xde terbagi harapan kat dia.... 

next,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, reconsider duluu help kau tu.. memanggg perlukan pertolongan ke? memang tak mampu nak buat sorang ke?  fikir banyak kaliiii.... sebab nak susahkan orang nii... kena simpatiii jugak. huhu. jgn terbiase mintak tlg, be independent.. 

pastuu, kalau orang yg kau ask help tu mcm  reluctant and xdpt tlg, jgnla pakse lagi.. jangan la buat die rase besalah xtlg.. make sure u dont do that. lau mcm pesen aku ni, ak jenis mudah rase bersalah. pstu, org mmg suke buat ak rse mcm tu. smpai kekadang, ak buat dngn terpaksa. huwaaa. nak pahala. tp jgn la mintak tolong kasaq2 and paksa. bg org suke rela tolong gittew.   

last but not least, kena tahu yg orang yg kau selalu mntk tlg tu ade masa utk diorg sendiri, dah organize hidup diorg sndiri. n kau xleh sewenang2 nye nk ubah planner diorg dgn pegi isi aktiviti "teman kau" "tolong kau" tuuu ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


"BERPADA PADALAH MEMINTA TOLONG :) "








sincerely Miss LOL

Monday, 22 August 2016

Risau

Nak dekat masuk uia dah and aku sangat risau. risau nak sambung belajar tu satu. ada satu lagi kerisauan. kerisauan yang mana kawan kawan akan ajak keluar ; tengok wayang, shopping, makan makan or kemungkinan TEMAN DATING ! :O hurm memang dating x elok berdua duaan  but i suggest dont heret me plis. dah dengar dah ajak ajakan nk mintak teman tgk wayang, teman mkan , teman p situ and so on. you guys might know about me having a relationship with a guy. but at least u can know about him, he seems like having a cute thought about our feelings ( kirenye die cam rase benda ni xelok, yg mmg sumerg tau kan) aku pon takut. so kitorang since cuti ni mmg jrang contact (anggapla tak contact 3 bulan), ad msg tny kbr tp stkt tu jela, ikut mood dia and slbihnya mmg berhubung melalui doa (tu pon lau die mendoakan aku) so xpela kan. yg pasti, the thoughts are good for us. xcontact, xbersayang2, xberjumpa, but still we hope for the best of us. and i keep loving him each day. ( rse mcm amazing ng diri sndiri sbb still syg even xcontact or berckp psl soal hti pon) die mmg mcm tu. lain sikit drp others yg expecting texts, calls, dating everyday. to my friends, dont worry. ur friend has a very nice guy here. just pray for us, n for him to love me though we dont contact each other. mmg sekarang ni pun, ak berdoa sgt Allah pnjgkan jdoh kami. with him + such thoughts n kesedaran, makin berkenanlah aku kat dia kan? lol . ok pasal tu xpenting, jgn risau everything is fine. sbb kau mintak laki yg baik kan, so nah. dapat yg baik sgt. ekekeke. hurm, yg aku risau ni psl weekend aku yang bakal diisi dgn kawan2 yg nak ajak kpd lagha. oh please guys, ckuplah aku habiskan pitis time cuti ni. let my weekends are filled with studying, sleeping or relaxing. those are better than spending money. mcm mane nak elakkan if ttibe golongan tu best friends or your roomates !!!!!!!?????!!?!?!!?!?! Hurm, xhabis pikir ni.. xtau nk elak cmne. sekali pon xguna duit, yet my time is too precious to do those things. awal2 ni xyh lg la kot. tnggu lepas mid term ker.. or sebulan sekali je ke. come on la. kawan kau ni xmintak ptptn, parent je tanggung. kesian tak? and im the eldest not the youngest. xpee ajak je org lain. in shaa allah i okay. xjeles. duit skrg ni lau bleh nk save utk bli hadiah hari jadi kawan je.. xnak dah manja2 kan diri , bli kt diri sndiri ye Ain. you tuu dh bykkk dahh barang. cannot go shopping anymore okay? risau sgt :'( sayang duit sbb xbrp nak ade. semoga Ain Irdina dpt berhati2 dk uia tuu. jgn belanja sakan nohh.
sincerely Miss LOL

mati

Cuti kali ni or apparently bulan ni, aku banyak dengar pasal kematian. kematian sanak saudara, kematian saudara kawan kawan dan sebagainya. dah empat kematian yang aku dah visit. 3 from sedara + kawan mak aku, satu from ayah kawan aku. tak kurang jugak berita pasal orang yang ditimpa penyakit, contohnya kawan mak aku, baru find out kena kanser usus. yang accident pon banyak jugak. seram sangat. sometimes, pernah jugak aku mintak mati. hmm, ni pendek akal namanya. bile aku rase sedihh sgt or rase mcm the whole world doesnt need and love me, i think the best way is to die. -_- tapi xdela serious sgt smpi make efforts to end my life. just terfkir mcm tu.. tpi bile ditarbiah balik diri ni, ramai yg mati skrg ni mintak nk dikmbalikan kedunia. nak tebus balik dosa dosa lalu.. aku boleh imagine situasi tu. just like when u committed the sins, and you really regret with those sins, and mmg really2 want to putar balik masa dan tak buat. so mcm tula lbih kurang dgn org yg dah mati mintak hidup. both impossible. kite just boleh bertaubat n mintak Allah ampunkan dosa tu. bile kite selalu keep in mind such things, kite mmg takkan buat silap. tp tulah masalahnya. bile buat, tak ingat pulak benda2 ni.. im so terrified. i wish to die but am i ready ? x kan. so lepas ni, kena always be prepared untuk mati. elakkan buat dosa dan tingkatkan amal ibadah. kadang2, dosa yg kite buat tu, kite xnampak pun and kite sedar xsedar je buat. contohnye, dengki or bersangka buruk.. mostly benda ni berkait ng friends and family. lau ng family tu, rase xdisayangilah rse disisihkan la dan sebagainye. kdg2 tu baik xyah fikir la, buat serabut kepala je. truskan idup, buat kerja elok2, janji ade tmpt berteduh. gittew. lau kawan tuuuuuuuuuu, kawan kan ramai. kawan je ng semua. lau ad yg xbrp nak ikhlas tu, ramai lagi kan yang ikhlas. ok bai. nk tlis psl benda lain lak.
sincerely Miss LOL